'Forgotten, Thou Seat' Oh, Most shapely and beauteous, Thou great Gluteus Maximus, Thou all awards do win With thy actin and myosin, Interlocking with precision wondrous, Forsooth! Thou hast verily awed us By thy endeavour, nay, thy very calling To hold us upright, and keep us from falling Forwards onto our forelimbs Like the Rhesus, the Gibbon and Cappuchin. In some thou art virtually atrophied, In others, with adipose lined liberally; In one, an object of pride, In another, something to hide; In some, an aphrodisiac, most heady, In others, a target for a boot that is ready; In one, a gentle undulation, In another, an overhanging domination. Yet for all thy divers form, Thou art present in every infant born. Now, as for me, I thank God for thee, For through thee hath I liberty, For the versatile, opposing thumb Oweth its freedom to the humble bum, Whose contraction at the base of my body Pulleth me upright and setteth my hands free To be tools for my creativity Breathed into me by the Holy Deity. This is why though monkeys swing high, They maketh not even a simple toy, For though they hath opposing thumbs, They hath no enlarged bum, Needeth not they hands that are free; One needeth NO tools for NO creativity! Forsooth, how wondrous thy being, Alack! We art so unseeing!! FORGOTTEN lieth thy TRUE value, Credit to thee long due. Fear not! I arise, Champion of thy Cause, I shall shout thy remembrance to fainting applause!