Thu, May 16, 10:26 PM CDT

Feed the muse: "The Acme Muse-O-Matic"

Writers Comics/Cartoons posted on Sep 11, 2023
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Description


A long, long time ago in a galaxy far, far away Hivewire3D held a "Feed The Muse" render contest. I managed one proper entry, but also had some ideas that I was unable to do in time, and then couldn't be bothered to do. But what I did manage to do was to write descriptions of what the finished pictures would look like. Feed the muse: "The Acme Muse-O-Matic" (Being a 4-panel cartoon-strip type thingy, but done without pictures) Panel 1: A smarmy 1950's-type salesman holding the boxed item and crooning Bing Crosby style "When my muse is on vacation, there is one sure-fire solution, that's the Acme Muse-O-Matic !" Panel 2: The salesman gestures towards a customer who's wearing the device. "Simply place the device over your head with the control dial at the front (make sure you set it to 'Reality' before you put it on!), tighten the suction cups using the fitting screws, and attach the thingumajigs and whatyamacallits." The dial and it's settings are clearly visible in the image: 'Reality' is at the 12 o'clock position; 'Slightly Odd' at 2 o'clock; 'Rather Strange' at 4 o'clock; 'Very Weird' at 6 o'clock; 'Totally Bizarre' at 8 o'clock; and 'Bleuuuarrrggh!'at 10 o'clock. The customer has his eyes crossed as he tries to see the dial... Panel3: "The Acme Muse-O-Matic needs no battery as it draws power directly from your brain. Start slowly by turning the dial one click clockwise. You'll find that..." The image shows the view from inside the customer's head as he finally crosses his eyes sufficiently to actually see the control dial... from behind - there's a thinks bubble 'one... click... clockwise!' and you can see that he has just turned the dial one click clockwise (there's a 'CLUNK!'sound effect too)... but from his back-to front perspective. Panel 4: "... NOOO !!! NEVER TURN IT ANTICLOCKWISE FROM REALITY !!!" Use your own imagination for the picture ! Footnote: If you enjoyed this product you may like some of our other lines: the Acme Picass-O-Matic, Dali-O-Matic, and Pollock-O-Matic.

Comments (4)


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Wolfenshire

5:29AM | Mon, 11 September 2023

I was with you, right up until you said it draws power directly from my brain. So basically, it has the battery power of that flashlight sitting next to my backdoor that you have to pound on several times to get a dim glow out of the bulb.

3dcheapskate

6:21AM | Mon, 11 September 2023

You've made the obvious, but incorrect, assumption. The thingumajigs and whatyamacallits are in fact more biological than electrical and the energy that they draw upon is more psycho-somniantic than electro-magnetic. The only people who have problems using the Muse-O-Matic are the unimaginative and the brain-dead. And of course those who turn the dial anticlockwise from reality.

3dcheapskate

6:27AM | Mon, 11 September 2023

You've found number three! Yes, there are actually three certainties in life - death, taxes, and owning one of those flashlights.

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Wolfenshire

6:59AM | Mon, 11 September 2023

Ah, pscho-somniantic, that's every doctor's visit I've ever had. 'Hey Doc, check out this bite' - 'I don't see a bite' - 'I'm telling you, it's right there, I think I was bitten by a werewolf' - 'Go home, Mr. Wolfe, I have real patients to see'

3dcheapskate

7:07AM | Mon, 11 September 2023

In that case the Muse-O-Matic would work a treat for you !

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RedPhantom

7:49AM | Mon, 11 September 2023

As I'm reading this, I'm picturing it in the style of Tex Avery and his House of Tomorrow cartoon. I'm not sure anyone wants what's in my head to come out without some major filtering. Fun idea though

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3dcheapskate

7:39AM | Tue, 12 September 2023

That's the beauty of... I'll have to come up with a catchy name for this type of thing... how about Word Renders ?


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