Playing with my photos and Mehdi's kaleidoscope plugin. UPDATE about my cancer: We've spent a whole day struggling with the news we got on Monday and what to put here and how to say it, and decided to give you all an update on my lung cancer after my oncologist appointment. . Sorry that this is the way some of you are finding out, but we just haven't had the energy for phone calls or personal messages today. . We've recorded (with permission) all that our doctor said during the appointment so that we could remember it accurately and refer to it as we come to terms with it all, and here's a significant excerpt. . After being told all the facts known so far, and the likely possible scenarii, I asked: "Overall, how dire is my situation considering the elements you have now in your possession, with the data you have now? How bad it is on the scale of lung cancer?" . He said: "I mean I’d love to say that, for a 44-year old, this is not a bad thing, but there are a lot of bad features here. And I’m an optimist, that’s how I come to work every day, but I – unfortunately – I’m gonna suspect that this is not gonna be curable. I’m gonna suspect that everything we’re trying to do is to buy you time. I’m going to hope that that amount of time is going to be measured in years. I do have some patients comparable to you who are alive 2, 3, 4, 5 years later, but to promise that or to promise more than 5 years based on what I think is going to end up being your stage, would be unfair." . I (and Denise) do need to come to terms with that possibility. . Please do not simply try to cheer us up by denying the reality of our situation, and tell us something along the lines of "oh, you'll get through this and be okay!". . We feel that this is not helpful, especially right now, and is even hurtful to us. That does not mean that we don't hope for the best, it is just that we need to come to terms with it all in our own time and words. . Denise and I will stay positive and make the best of it, no matter what. . That said... . One positive thing happened already today: i got a bone strengthener IV infusion, which already feels like it helped some. The purpose of this is to help my bones to prevent further possible breaks, and maybe even get the affected ribs stronger. . Radiation begins on Thursday, as well. Chemo is a possibility, depending on the PET scan results. Surgery is not likely an option. . That is all we know for sure for now. . Thanks for your support, prayers, help and understanding. Jean-Luc & Denise Previously: "Caterpillar" "