Tranquility-Lumina W.I.P by CrownPrince
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Description
Ok all you bryce experts i need some help.
Here is the discription of the station, and i am not satisfied with what i have so far..
I nee help and constrution tips..
It needs more of.. everything.
Hopefully you can understand what i mean by that..
A cooperative effort between the Galactic League, and the twenty-three free stellar systems of the southern rim. It was named such by some young idealist who thought it would bring the light of peace to this region of space.
Situated at the halfway point between the League spatial borders and Symplicity, the largest and most powerful of the planetary governments in the area. It is the focal point of political intrigue and trade between the free states and the League. Supposedly neutral to the local politics the Galactic League still keeps a representative living on the station.
Billions of credits went into its creation. Carved into the heart of a huge meteor it is over five miles wide and three miles high. It has seven sections and ten levels, each section with its own major docking platforms and ports. To function smoothly each section also has its own command and control dept, all under the oversight of Central Command. The total population averages forty-five thousand individuals, eighty percent of whom are permanent residents.
Comments (5)
neat idea! and nice job so far! Excellent story behind it as well. :) I would add a few smaller ships flying by (very small) showing thruster trails, and vessels arriving and departing as well as maybe some sort of construction or maintenance going on (on the outside) and maybe a few brighter starts/galaxy space anomolies in the distance. Add a few large domes with trees/buildings/lights on it... Some sort of complex glowing apparatus on the outside as well..the stabilizing unit..like a gyro or somthing as well... just ideas.. :)
You know I've been thinking on this for you and I've just wondered where the light source is coming from, seeing as a meteor is not necessarily close to a sun. Perhaps it generates it's own light with beacons nearby as well as on poles at certain points poking out of the meteor. Of course this means more thought on the shadows too. Also transmittors of the age, as depending on the actual material basis of the meteor, communications could be interferred with if its inside it's heart. Oh and another thing, perhaps the meteor itself needs more depth, more rocky/detailed surface with craters or canyons slightly deeper, though not in use for the stations purpose as they were wrong? dimensions or shape for that? I agree about the ships and the ideas of slightly visible domes with hints of whats inside sounds cool.
How about something on top that looks like a 'crown' or tower, representing the High Ideals of the structure?
Some kind of windows or ports.. some for navigatio, but also some just for passenger viewing lounges? Personally, I think the docks might be a bit large. They are making it seem much smaller than your stated dimensions. Love the idea and story.
The idea behind the large ports is that they should be able to dock 300-400,000 ton craft. But now, i do see what you mean.. it does make the asteroid look small. Weezer good idea. Outside maintenance, and outer domes...