A Mothers Love by Pixy13 ()
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Sat proudly on my bookcase in my new home is a picture of and my mum from a family holiday when I was 11 years old, a picture at night with her holding me up.
My parents pulled me out of school so that we could afford the holiday, they made some excuse so that they could take me to that luxurious resort in the countryside for my birthday, they couldn't afford it during school breaks as the place hiked the prices out of their reach.
During the first couple of days my dad fell ill, he tried shellfish and discovered he had an allergy to it, undeterred me and mum spent the next few days together. Mum had noticed a few times that I seemed off? She couldn't say why but I just seemed distant and subdued? A few times she caught me staring aimlessly into the distance, she thought maybe the main area of the resort combined with worrying about my dad was playing with my mind. Mum got me this cool bracelet to try and lift my mood but it didn't shift it, though it was a nice bracelet, feeling nervous she took me to sit with her outside and alone. Much to her surprise sitting under the moonlight for an hour seemed to stop whatever had been bothering me, we sat there most evenings with or without my dad as his ailments repeated on him.
My mum had a copy of this picture in her purse still nearly 16 years later, it's bitter sweet for both of us though.
Sweet because for my mum it was her most cherished memory and me how she loved me the most, as her little Fae.
Bitter because she had unknowingly just witness my first depression crash, and this mood slump would be a mere warm-up compared to what would start happening in just a few weeks and continue for the rest of my life.
I love this picture just like she does, though it was the last time that I would be her daughter in the sense that she had become accustomed too, though she did accidentally discover a future coping mechanism for me.