repasky's Blog

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10:01 pm

 The Human Syndrome
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It took most all my life to find it. I hate having to look for something that seems so obvious afterwards. Reluctant to accept limitations, I grappled with the apparent imperfections of life. Were we not all together as one source? Entropy it was called. The way of atoms. The journey of light. Surreal moments of grandeur scattered about. Profound and breath taking scenes of awe and wonder. Blessed opportunities like blossoms, ripe and inviting, filling the experience with sights, odors, and sounds. That's how it looks from the outside, even on a bad day. There is something sacred about life. At least that is what I have been told. One can never be sure of information. But it was worth considering. After all what harm is there in looking?

Long ago, in a dark cold space, we began our journey, our way into the unknown. There was no consequence to consider nor a way to go back. What will be will be and so began time. Time, a quantity to gauge entropy. Some years later life began to differentiate itself from the background energy. This place, twelve billion years from where we started, spinning around a small star in a young galaxy is my current address. It seemed like the best place to look after years of careful consideration.

There were some risks involved. Any journey into the unknown involves risk. Unimaginable. Makes the journey all the more interesting I suppose. I would need a body. Not knowing if I would survive intact, I scattered notes and markers in places I was likely to investigate once I had a body. It was quite a journey into the body. I felt myself sucked into the vortex, dropped into a tunnel of raw energy, in motion, with a bright light at the end. I let myself flow with the stream of energy and soon entered into the light and promptly lost myself in the waves of energy that washed over/through the brain of the body I now was in.

I learned how to use the body quickly and easily. It was comfortable and warm. Sensations that I had never experienced before. Warm, of course, but comfortable was new. The sensory apparatus was spectacular. Incredible acuity and differentiation. The body/brain was well trained in science and philosophy. But I was in awe of sensation and feeling. So much input from the senses, constantly. It was overwhelming. And delicious. Frighteningly so. It would be nearly ten years before I could think again. Or have a sense of self amid all the energy present in this body. I am incredibly small, little more than a tiny flicker of light. The body/universe is incredibly huge and massive. Nearly 12 billion years in the making. Human adds a new dimension to life.

I clearly remember the day I started thinking again. It was about six years after I entered this body. I began to wonder who I was. I began to do art, music, and writing. I soon found the first of many notes and markers. Subtle cues and clues designed to modify the brain to accommodate my way of thought. I did the first of my experiments while living in a commune in LA. And so began my second phase.

I performed many tests and experiments for more than 20 years. Some involved people and others involved only this body. Communication became my focus with music, art, and stories my medium. I became fascinated with the potential of humans. The well developed brain supported a unique form of consciousness. A transcendent nature. Pure and sublime, a place where awe and wonder dance. Despite my endeavors, I was not able to realize that potential (yet?). I suspect it is because of communication flaws caused by the background noise of existence. Existence is a noisy thing, in addition to the constant hum, there are pops, and clicks even waves of compressed noise. Small wonder that communication is so fragile and delicate.

The past few years have been interesting. Even God would be proud. I finished my work. I wondered how the experience has changed me. Would I ever be 'me' again? Or will I forever know being touched as a human. Will I ever want to forget being touched as a human? Will I ever forget touching another? Art, music, stories? Some where near the edge, where time has gathered in a great pond. Sparkling in the light, the vast expanse of life covers the surface. Constantly renewed through streams of consciousness in a place called Human.

The content of this writing is copyright 2007 Flicker Light Studio.

10:41 am

 On Line There is no There There
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It seems that once opinions are made it can be difficult to change them without influence. The techniques used are often persuasive spins that exploit the protocols and norms of the group relying on sympathy and coercion as the favored tools of manipulation. Such are our normal day to day interactions with others. We attempt to persuade as do they. If we share a common opinion then our interaction reinforces and nurtures our perceptions. If we disagree our interactions are not likely to be constructive and may cause conflict that can not be resolved and instead must be tolerated.

Without a dissenting perspective it is difficult to ascertain the quality of information we hold as true. Our own biases and perceptual blind spots often prevent us from realizing our full potential. Information we might have used, never reaches our consciousness.

If we are to continue to evolve and transcend our animal response biases and perceived enemy classifications, we must be able to explore and examine, without hatred or malice, the dissenting and sometimes conflicting views and opinions of others. If we are willing to interact and present a view point we may ourselves oppose, we can make/create a positive and constructive result from our conflicts. On line conflicts are similar to those in real life however, in real life we either accept through tolerance or we leave the environment. While this is possible for schools and jobs, it is much more difficult to leave a family. On line there is no there to leave. Tolerance and acceptance are required if we are to interact in progressive and constructive ways.

By presenting the other point of view, we help ourselves gain tolerance and develop acceptance. We do not become victims of opinion nor feel a need to track and oppose those opinions. We can, as a society and as a species, transcend our natural tendency to attack those we feel have attacked us however, it is not something we can do without effort and conscious thought. For many, the gratification of attacking when there is no place (on Line) for the target to seek relief is sufficient to maintain the expense and energy required to continue and escalate the attacks. That can make the Internet seem like a cruel and damning place filled with intolerance and vitriol to those who have slighted their attackers with just opinion. Greed works best when no one else can see you. Hate works best when there is no place for the target to hide. It is not difficult to find followers and believers in hate and victimization. We all have had experiences that allow us to empathize with others who have been slighted, hated, or hurt. Groups and organizations that use hate or intolerance as a source of unification often appear to others as thugs and mean spirited.

Take some time to present the opposing view, even if only to mention it exists. The credibility and value of your opinion will be enriched and your ability to influence others will be enhanced. Deny the other view point and you will appear as a bully, a tyrant, a snob, or a malcontent to those who can appreciate or tolerate both points of view.

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